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Posts tagged ‘funny stories’

No Worries

No Worries

Free to Dance

 

Flying through the air
Feel like the world
Does not exists
Just enjoying myself
In my own way
I feel like no one is there
No worries to worry about
It is just me in my own world
Dancing to be free
It is my passion
I just relax and let my body flow
Because this is me
No one can tell me how to dance
I just love to dance my own way

By Trinity Smith Age 10

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Adventures In the Night

Adventures in the Night

Adventures in the Night

Net in one hand
Flashlight in the other
Being as quite as can be
Sneaking up behind him
Trying not to scare him
I smack my net to the wall
I caught him
I get him in the net
He is trying to escape
But I don’t let him
Having so much fun
Giggling and laughing
I caught a lizard

By Trinity Smith Age 10

Book

Book

Images from being List in a book world

Sitting here all alone
In my magical world
Seeing the book in my own way
Loving each word day by day
Almost done can’t wait till the next
My imagination flows on and on
My grandma says it is time for dinner
So sad but still a winner
Can’t wait to go back to my book
I end up finishing and go to the next
Reading and reading on and on
Till all my books are gone

By Trinity Smith Age 10

Dream Land

One day I woke up and were was I

Dream Land

I don’t know I think a dream land
Because it was filled with butterflies
There was candy and ballons
And a lot more and I could jump up to the moon
I loved this dream land you can say
The rides you play on and pies you eat all day
It is a very fun land you can say
But then I woke up and it was all a dream that one day

By Trinity Ann Smith Age 10

Farewell My Three Legged Friend

Written by Ann LeFlore: for dVerse Open Link Night Week 14. I just recently lost my dog after 11 years. He was a special dog that had only three legs. Five years ago my boyfriend gave me a gift of a small ball of brown fur that had the biggest feet you ever did see. She was a mixture between a German Shepard and Rottweiler. She had the sad eyes of the Rottweiler and grew to be taller than my other dog weighing in at 63 kilo. She is a big dog and it was so much fun to watch her tell my other dog off when he did not come in from the river. Bandit is no longer with us and Naya is lonely and misses him so much. She walks around the yard looking for him and goes over to where his grave is and sits there all day long. This poem is written from Naya to Bandit to tell him good bye. It is a dogs perspective of a best friend.

 

Farewell My Three Legged Friend

When I came to your space
You kept me in my place
You showed me who was boss
But today I am at a loss

You were there all the time
Life with you was all so fine
Chasing coconuts in the lagoon
Watching you bark at the moon

 I was a small bundle of fur
You looked at me with a big gurr
Why did they bring me here
It was hell for you to endure

I grew up so fast and so tall
I was no longer afraid to chase the ball
When we swam in the ocean
I caused such a commotion

 When dinner was served at night
You always left me your last bites
When it rained you had your space
But you were always willing to share your place

 Now today I am so alone
I walk around to sit on your thrown
I go by your place where you are now
I duck my head and give you a bow

Farewell my three legged friend
I will always remember you till the end
I was your Queen and you my King
Until the end I will always wear your ring

Indian War Paint

My husband was always tinkering with his cars. One car he had needed a new transmission. He knew he could do this

Indian War Paint

himself. He purchased the transmission and had it delivered to our home. He went out and rented the jacks with chains to lift the motor out of his car. Each afternoon and on the weekend he was under this car taking off the old transmission in the middle of our driveway. He had the garage blocked with his car and the new transmission on the floor I was forced to park our other car in the driveway while he worked on his.

 I would hear my husband yell for me to come and help him. I know nothing about cars and had other things to do in the house. I would arrive and he would ask me to hold a wrench on a bolt for him while he went under the car to loosen the other end. For some reason I could never get this one right. He would yell for daughter who was 6 years old at the time to come and help him. She was always there next to him doing everything with him.

 I would laugh as he would pick her up by her feet and she would crawl into the motor of the car like a little snake. She could wedge herself in to the smallest places. She was skinny and had long legs and arms on her. He would get her in there just where he wanted her and she could block herself inside the motor and hold the wrench the way he wanted.

 The two of them would spend hours on end under this car and in the motor. She would come in the house covered in grease from head to toe. She had one of my husband’s old shirts she would wear that went almost to the floor on her. On the inside of our garage we had another shower where he would clean her before coming into the house. She was more of a son to my husband than our oldest son was. He hated to get his hands dirty and you would never see him under the car with my husband.

 One weekend my husband was almost done with the transmission in the car. He had in wedged into place and filled with 5 quarts of transmission fluid. He was out in the middle of the driveway working and my daughter was right there beside him. She had her own wooden plank with roller on it so she could roll under the car with him. He had made a special one for her that was small and did not interfere with his work.

 I can remember this afternoon like it was yesterday. I head something crash, my husband yelled out in anger and in shock. I had a bad feeling in my stomach that the jacks had fallen and the car was sitting on top of my husband and daughter. I went running through the house in utter panic. When I reached the back door I was afraid to open the door. I knew I had to move and get out there. What if the car was crushing my husband and daughter?

 I reached for the door knob not being able to feel it turn under sheer panic. I finally got the back door open and went outside. I could see the car was still on the jacks and my husband was moving under the car. I looked under the car and all I saw was a pool of red. I was sure this was blood when I first saw it. I was in shock and could not even speak.

I stood up getting ready to run in the house and call the fire department to come and rescue my husband and daughter. Next thing I know the two of them come rolling out from under the car. They are both covered in red liquid. I was in a state of panic I had no idea what had happened.

 My husband took one look at my face and assured me all was fine. He said the transmission jack had slipped and dumped the 5 quarts of transmission fluid down on top of him and my daughter. They were both covered in transmission fluid.

 I was in such shock I started to scream widely at my husband that he should not have our daughter under that car putting her life in danger. I saw her standing there dripping in red fluid all in her hair, face, and hands. My husband calmed me down enough and I got control of myself. I then took a look at my little girl who was covered in transmission fluid.

 My daughter had very long hair down past her rear end and it was filled with transmission fluid. I had no idea how I could ever get this mess out of her hair. I left the two standing there dripping in transmission fluid and went in the house to get some scissors.

 When I came back outside my daughter was back under the car again with my husband and the two of them were laughing so hard. I peered under the car to see my daughter slapping the transmission fluid with her hands and using it to paint on my husbands face. She said that he was her hero and now he was an Indian. She was using the transmission fluid to paint his face. She said now he was ready for war and he was the Chief of all Indians.

 I was ferrous when I saw her under this car again. My only thoughts were to get her out of there cut off that mess of hair and try and clean her up. I told my husband to stop playing around and bring her in the house. I needed to cut her hair and clean her up. He said you will never cut her hair again. Leave her alone I will take care of her and clean her up.

 The two played around cleaning up the transmission fluid for about an hour. I could hear them laughing and playing around during this time. Next thing I know it is quiet and they were not laughing any longer. I went back outside to see what was happening. The only thing I could think of was how I could get that mess out of her hair. I had made up my mind I would cut off her hair so I could clean her up.

 When I arrived outside he had her in the garage all her clothes stripped off and she was covered in this white grease remover. He had her hair full of grease remover. He was using old rags to take the transmission fluid off of her. He had so much of this in her hair it was pink in color.

 I looked at my daughter standing there covered in white grease cleaner and her hair dripping pink drops. I told my husband you will never get this mess out of her hair and it was better to cut it off and let it grow again. He disagreed with me and said that he would take care of her and to go back in the house and leave him alone.

 You see my husband never forgave me the one time I cut her hair. She was 2 years old and decided she did not want to eat her oatmeal. She took her bowl of oatmeal and tuned it upside down on her head and was wearing her bowl. I had this mess all over the house and in her hair. I cut off her hair when I took her in the bathroom to clean her up. My husband came home that night to see the hair cut I gave her and he was so angry. I had made a terrible mess of her hair and he had a hard time to get it cut straight after I was done. He told me that would be the last time I would ever cut her hair.

 After an hour my daughter came in the house all wrapped in a towel and went in her room to get dresses. When she came back out her hair looked like a rats nest. It was so full of tangles and I had no idea how I could ever get them out. Her skin was so red I thought that it was stained for good with transmission fluid. Come to find out that in order to get the grease remover off her my husband showered her in the hottest water he could. He said that he had to wash her hair 5 times to get all the grease out of her hair.

 After my husband appeared and went in our room to change. He took our daughter and sat her in his lap and started to comb out that mess in her hair. He worked on her hair for over an hour taking such tiny careful strokes combing out every single knot in her hair. I kept complaining to him that he should just cut off her hair and he would give me the look which told me it was time to be quiet.

 My husband and daughter were very close and still are to this day. She was always there with him side by side working in the garage, building this and that, and loving it when he worked on the motor of his cars. I will never forget that day when I thought I had lost the two of them when I heard that awful crash.

Cockroach Invasion

The year was 1971 and they were working on our road. Tearing up the sidewalk, street, and parking area to put in new

Cockroach Invasion

sewer pipes down our street. Seem that we had old rusty sewer pipes and the City needed to replace them.

 This year when they started to tear up our roads we were invaded by cockroaches in our home. Everywhere we turned we had thousand of them all over the place. I tried to step on them but they would not die. Seemed like these little buggers had armor plated reinforced shells on the.

 We set out traps, but they avoided them. You know the cockroach hotels? They are to invite you in but never let you out. Seems these cockroaches were too smart to be fooled by the one way door policy. They never found their way in so it was not hard to find their way out.

 I was afraid to put out too much poison to kill my visitors. I felt that if I poisoned them one of my brood of kids would get in there playing around. I was afraid that they would have this on their hands and try to pick up something and eat it.

 The two younger boys and Oh Sid went on cockroach hunts in our home. They had Mason jars and would find the roaches and put them in the jars. It was a competition to see how many they could catch and have in their jars. My youngest son was quite inventive for his tactic of trapping cockroaches. He would get in my masking tape and roll his hand with tape. Each time he saw a cockroach he would slap his hand down on top of it and the roach would stick to the tape on his hand.

 My other son loved to catch bug and so one year we bought him a bug kit that had a small net. He would use this net to trap his cockroaches. Each one of them would play this game around the house. Oh Sid she did not care. She would lie on the floor and let the roaches run on her and afterwards would pick them up by their back legs and put them in the jar.

 It seemed the City would never finish the laying of pipes this year and everyone in the neighbor would have to live with the cockroaches from this mess. We complained to the City of what had happened in our homes and was told that when they were finished they would see what they could do about this. This did not help me out at all.

 I would open up the cupboards in my home and have these nasty creatures jumping out at me. I was afraid to walk around the house at night with the lights off. Seemed like they are night creatures and loved to stock you when you are sleeping. I had dreams of cockroaches climbing in my bed and walking all over me when I slept.

 During our invasion of cockroaches Grandma Simpson decided to come from Texas to see us. She wanted to spend the winter months with us. She said not to worry if we feed them they come back. If we starve them they would  leave. I never understood this method and to this day how can you stave them. I had 5 children who needed to eat and there was no way we could stop buying food in our home and cooking.

 During this time I sided with my second daughter Miss Prissy and tried to protect her so much. She was my tale teller or what the others called her tattle teller. She would find ways to get her older sister and younger brothers in trouble all the time. Oh Sid was angry at this time. It seemed that her sister was telling on her all the time and I was always punishing Oh Sid for one reason or another.

 Oh Sid told her sister the next time she told on her that would be the last. I was afraid that Oh Sid would try something really mean to her sister. But was not sure what her plans were. I had long talks with her to calm her down. She said to me “Mom if you believe all that Miss Prissy says to you then I will get her back”. I could not imagine what she would do.

 I had Grandma Simpson talk with her and try to reason with her. Grandma Simpson said in her wise voice to me you should see what happens before you punish. You should not take another siblings word for this. I tried hard but during this time the invasion was on my mind all the time. I could not keep these cockroaches out of my head. I would try and close my eyes but all I saw was me covered in cockroaches running all over me.

 One day Miss Prissy was really active and telling on her brothers and sister all the time. I was at wits end and could not take much more. I finally sent the three of them to their rooms and refused to let them out. I said they would have to stay in their room until their Father got home that evening and he would deal with them.

 This evening at the dinner table the three were angry. They started to call Miss Prissy names and tease her something fierce. I am lucky that my husband was home from work and Grandma Simpson was there to calm them down. When we were cooking dinner I opened one of the cupboards to get out some rice and had 8 cockroaches jumping down and running at me. I was at nerves end with these cockroaches.

 The children went to bed this evening and we were sitting in the living room trying to decide the best method to get rid of all the roaches in our home. Mind you we were not the only one that had this invasion. Grand Simpson said that she would retire for the evening as she put it and see us in the morning.

 She passed by the girls room and see Oh Sid was not sleeping but standing next to her sister’s bed. She sees her standing there watching her sister sleep. Before she could reach Oh Sid she pulled out her Mason jar of cockroaches and starts dumping the entire jar of these nasty creatures on top of her sister when she slept.

 Grandma Simpson goes running in the room and grabs Oh Sid but it was too late. She had finished emptying her jar of cockroaches on top of her sister when she was sleeping. She had a smile on her face when Grandma reached her. Grandma grabber her arm and tried to figure out what in the world would make her do such a thing to her sister.

Oh Sid looked at her Grandma and saw the fire in her eyes. She quietly said to her “She deserves this for all her tattle telling. She gets her prissy ways with Mom all the time and never has to do anything around here. She is the little Princess here in this house. I told her the next time she got me in trouble she would regret it. I know how she hates cockroaches so now she can sleep with them in her bed.”

 Grandma was in shock at what Oh Sid had done this time. In her wildest dreams she never imagined that Oh Sid was this angry and would dump a jar of cockroaches on top of her sister when she slept. After she calmed down she started to laugh. I came running into the girls’ room to see what happened.

 I almost died of shock when I saw my younger daughter bed covered in cockroaches and she slept through the entire event. I had to wake her up and take both girls out of the room that night. I put Oh Sid with Grandma to sleep and took Miss Prissy in our room to sleep. The next day Oh Sid had to clean up this mess and find all the roaches in their room. This is one time I wished I could have wrung her neck for what she did. All my nightmares of seeing roaches running on top of me came true when I saw my youngest daughter covered in them.